CHAPTER 3

You know when someone wants to tell you something, and they're throwing in all these unrelated details, talking in circles trying to amp up the suspense in a way- and you're there confused, and just wanna tell them "oh. what's your point...?"

That was season 1 of Westworld

The only mindfuck I got from it was from Anthony Hopkins' deliveries of his one liners; mostly his euphemism for godliness in Michaelangelo's god/Adam painting.

I never noticed the brain before. But it's also very on brand for Anthony Hopkins to play a cerebral character. He was the only thing that had any semblance of depth.

I liked this though. It's a really pretty way of saying we're horny and perpetually stupid.

Ummm, the last episode was weird. Women can be strong characters, but only if strong male characters die? Is that the only merit we're capable of achieving... lol? like. what? Like, I really liked the engineer. She was chillin, being an engineer, doing her job, and contributing to a narrative in a way that made sense lol. But watch out, miss bUlK aPpErCePtIoN, I sAvE mUhSeLf. I mean... I'm kind like that too, but I don't put people (specifically men) more capable than me down in order to establish that. That whole... reach... felt... like a lot.

Overall... it was a confusing mess until episode 6, when they tried to talk all fancy computer talk, but all they were saying was that the hosts didn't have enough RAM when the reverie update went live and it overrode a bunch of old commands in the code. Thus, autonomy. LOLWUT

i MEAN. That's a pretty careless oversight. Even if it was an unexpected (lol?) update, to only allow machines to cap at the required space for them to run is like... that's... that's not even good. There's a market for extra memory for a reason. Instead of upgrading memory and reinputing the original code, they just were like WELL GUESS WE GOTTA RETIRE THEM, and that's what the drama was over.... :|

I liked episodes 6-9, with the technical stuff, but zoned out during the western stuff. Mysterious Ed Harris playing a character that seems like just a whatever dude... was obvious he wasn't just a whatever dude. I can't stand when tv shows do that lol. WEAK STORYTELLING. This is why I can't watch tv shows, at least not current ones.

Housemate said going into it analyzing everything will just work against me because nothing gets uncovered until later on. And that's... Those are the mind fucks that I live for. I love those types of narratives.

BUT throwing tons of random storylines, that don't connect, at the viewer in the first episode hoping something sticks isn't it. Then following with that endless jumping from one plot to the next, and they having nothing to do with each other, is... torment.

Westworld season 1... I'm sorry. You're a mess. Anthony Hopkins and the chill engineer chick who was sure of herself and didn't reach over anyone to make a statement, were the characters that left the best impressions on me.

Other than that, I liked the dude that helped whatsherface, he reminded me of the main story in Fallout 4. The narrative is.. actually... very very very very similar. The institute? Yeah. So. I've been playing Fallout 4 recently lol.God Fallout 4 is so good.

Been reading lots of manga, and this felt on point.

MOVING ALONG.

It's been so nice these past few days. I've been working on my moon tan.

It's coming in nicely. Because I'M STAYING HOME DURING A PANDEMIC :)

Since it was so nice, I even went out to our backyard, not to take out the trash, but for a whole 5 minutes... dipped my legs in our pool. Then crabwalked back inside the house.

This week will be the last time that I'll be calling Anaheim my home.

This is totally a new chapter. Closing up the last, very good chapter, and writing the next. I'll be moving in with Chicken, to continue our journey through higher levels together. I only ever lived with a partner once before, when I was 19 and thought my world would end if he was away from me for longer than a few hours.

This time, it's unreal still to me how much this fellow earth sign has been a continuous source of positive vibes and support for me our entire journey together. The most remarkable thing of all... I had secrets. He felt them welling up in me, though never pushed about it. Over time, he's made it so safe for us, that I've told him everything. My traumas, my gruesome physical flaws and insecurities, my lowest of the low life choices and mistakes... he knows it all, every detail. And all he's ever said to me in return, especially when I feel like I'm doubting myself and the direction I'm going, is that he will be with me to help me get through it. He wasn't going anywhere.

There's no judgement, no reprimanding, no unsolicited advice, just... leveling with me and listening. And that is so ... like. Unreal. I've been told I'm a good listener... I'm also a bottler. In an attempt to not distort my own sense of reality, and to not exhaust my loved ones emotionally, I bottle. Not with him.

Also

I've had exes that were threatened by my best friend in the whole wide world, Ponies.

Ponies is someone who will be in my life forfuckingever. He will be at my wedding, he will be at my funeral, he will be at my deathbed if I beat him to it. But I tell him everything, I go to him about things when I'm stuck. He's so important to me and I love him so much.

Chicken knows this, SO to show support and to be friendly, he invited Ponies to HQ and gave him a tour of our campus, where they got to sit down and talk and just chill for a while.

Chicken... I can't put into words how beautiful of a person he is. He's opened his mind so much for me. He opened his mind to DATE ME.

CAN I TELL YOU HOW HE WASN'T EVEN ATTRACTED TO ME WHEN WE FIRST MET. I put him off because of how I looked. It wasn't until a get together one night at work that we got an opportunity to talk more and we bonded over PC gaming- the classics, but most importantly Warcraft III and Star Wars Galaxies. His interest in tech, computers, and gaming drew me to him, and he started realizing how much we have in common. We could potentially ignore each other in peace while gaming. And only nag each other when it was time to eat. Dope.

My favorite memory of one of our first few exchanges was when we decided to give each other our social media. Papa Morheim was right behind him. He didn't realize it at the time until he looked up, looked back, and saw Papa Morheim smiling at him. I could've died. A part of him probably did.

AND HERE WE ARE, ALMOST 3 YEARS LATER. I've made the choice to move in with him and do the live together thing. This is important to me because living with someone, as I learned when I was 19, is huge. It's no longer going over to his place and staying there for a while, then coming home when I want- no. It's living together. And people think they're not that different... but let me tell you... they are DIFFERENT. But.. I've already been through it, and I know what to expect, and we're there. And it feels pretty good to say.

I'm just extremely happy that I'm with someone, having 100% transparency about everything I've bottled up for the last few years... it feels really good. And I'm confident that he's kept that transparency with me as well. We push each other and lift each other to do better and to remain grounded when life gets dumb. He's my team mate. My partner. My equal. And if we wanna play pretend, that works too but at the end of the day, we can both assemble computers and that's the love standard I always wanted. I mean that literally and figuratively.

He bought me Indian food to eat while I wrote this tonight T_T

CHICKENG VINDALOO AND CHICKENG TIKKA MASALA

SO SPICY HNNNNNNG

Indian curry is mmpf.

So yeah. That's happening this weekend. And while I'm really sad to go because I love this house and lived here for 3+ years, I'M READY, GARY

Also, if you leave a cute encouraging note for the Chipotle workers, they give you a phat one

Um... Donkey Kong Country is now available to play on Nintendo Switch Online and this track is still a bop. My coworkers and I would reminisce about it but now I can live it all over again and I'm.... it's a good time right now.

NEW FAVORITE MANGA

Mieruko-chan

aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I LOVE IT SO MUCH IT'S SO CUTE

It's a slice of life, but horror lol. I wanna get the physical copies but can't find them anywhere :(

It's current, they're up to the 26th volume and they come out with a new one every month. I NEED 27 I NEED IT. I wanna cosplay her T_T

I might. It's easy as balls, can just buy everything. But maybe I can make a ghostie for a prop.

anYWAY.

Happy Friday.

Hope everyone is safe and being responsible :)

The only thing that makes me sad right now is that my braces are gonna off soon. Buu :(

HO WELL

WEAR A MASK.